I woke up to an alarm at 4am. I pooped and went back to bed. I briefly went through the exercises of twisting my arms and body around and imagining myself standing on the floor and walking.
I drift in and out, feeling my breathing getting deep and steady and my body staying relaxed.
At first I can feel my body and the sensation of being in two places at once. I’m unsure as to whether this will be successful. I feel nearly awake.
I try moving my arms around and succeed, so I’m happy to know I made it into a lucid dream. I immediately start on the sigil, pouring some emotions into it this time like I had planned.
I feel something, so I let go, relax my body, and let myself be pulled somewhere else, letting my feet lift up off the floor.
After a moment I open my eyes and I’m in a house. I see some furniture across the orom and at first I’m like, ooh, that might be the arrangement of shapes from the sigil. I walk over there, which is living room and kitchen area. It doesn’t seem like the sigil brought me here. There’s two bar counters. I find that odd. I’m looking around and comparing it to apartments I’ve lived in. It’s kind of like one of them but not quite. I walk between the bar counters and look back at the first and it has turned into a dining table, which would make more sense as far as the layout. I’m a little annoyed that things are changing.
Maybe I need to try the sigil again? I consider sitting down at the table and drawing the sigil, but every time I have tried that in the past I felt myself fading away. For the moment, I feel quite stable here.
I close my eyes and draw the sigil mentally, making sure I remember all the parts. I can remember it fine and kind of draw it mentally, but I don’t really see it clearly.
That doesn’t seem to be working, so I call out to “Rachel”, and “Kevin’s Rachel”.
Nothing is happening, so I consider that I might as well call this a bust and pore through the details of all this later and see how I might alter my approach, and now I’ll try one of two other tasks I had queued up: reaching out to one of my lucid dreaming friends, or exploring some health issues. Briefly I consider which one to do.
As I’m considering that, out of the corner of my eye I notice a portal opening at the far end of the room, where I had entered from as well. It’s one of those white light doorway type portals. There’s something about it that seems fake, like it’s too cliché.
A man walks out. I wonder if maybe I managed to call someone with the sigil.
He said hello, or something innocuous. Then he’s next to a woman and is silent while she speaks to me. They’re standing on a stone platform, the stone wall covering their legs, in front of me.
“We are removing you from the organization,” the woman proclaims. “You are getting too egotistical.”
Hmm, that doesn’t make sense. I’m just exploring. I’m disappointed in her words, because it invalidates her. She’s just a sock puppet. She isn’t real.
I reject her and say in exasperation, “I’m not a part of any organization!”
In the process I reject the whole thing and fall into a normal dream.
My rejection of the two characters seems to have ejected me from the experience as a result of my sudden disinterest and lack of focus. Next time I might want to focus on something else instead of only rejecting the current situation.
A few days later, I told the group of this at the meeting. I’ll sum up what Kevin said in response:
The portal that opened is indeed how they like to travel. They had felt the beacon and located me. My dream environment was not very stable, and Rachael had trouble projecting into it. That’s how it would work – a projection of her, not her actually entering. As it was, she couldn’t get a good lock on it with the way my environment was unstable. The result is that she started to project through, but after those few seconds it stopped coming from her and I turned it into a dream character that was not her. It may have been her that said hello, but Kevin assured me that Rachael would not have called me egotistical.
However, being as she did locate me, she likely will be able to do so again without me having to use the sigil.
Kevin suggested stabilizing the environment in the same sort of way I would calm my mind.
There can be a bit of interpretation from the dream and the female dream character’s cryptic message. “Organization” could mean “lucid dreamers”. That you were “removed” is implied with actually losing lucidity. The reason: “getting too egotistical” can be interpreted that part of your goal is to have too much control over the dream and that in turn takes away control from other dream characters. Instead of rejecting a dream character’s statements, accept them, but ask more questions. Not necessary to focus on something else – dream characters are there for a reason. Though this contradicts the actual intent for Rachal, the issue of control might be a barrier to overcome to actually allow Rachel to project into the dream.
Ok, I’ll have to consider that, thanks! I tend to not show my dream characters much respect, because I always sense how fake they are, but I guess I should look at why I’m creating them.