I didn’t do much to prepare for this. A full day before, I listened to the Threshold track of the Wave II CD, which was productive in getting me used to laying quietly in Focus 10 and Focus 12, moving back and forth between them as instructed, or whatever states it was that I was in.
I feel that these tracks do help me practice being aware in other states of consciousness, not doing anything, just exploring a little, noticing, and being alert, but at the same time ignoring my physical body and not really feeling it much. It’s that same mentality that helps me become lucid in dreams or in apparent deep sleep, without moving to physical consciousness. Normally most of us are lucid only in physical consciousness, and otherwise we’re half-aware as we get lost in dreams or we’re out cold in deep sleep, and meditation like this helps me practice consciously exploring other states without waking up.
Normally I’m not a big fan of guided meditation, but these are pretty helpful to me. Keep in mind I repeat the same track over and over, day after day, or how ever often I do it, maybe going back to a prior one, until I feel like I’ve gotten all I can from it and can move onto the next track. That’s why I’m still only on the Wave II set despite having had the CDs for years.
Pro tip: I ripped the audio CDs, copied them to my cloud drive, and downloaded them to my phone so that I can plug my headphones into my phone. Much more portable than having to use my laptop and the CD. My newer laptop doesn’t even have a CD drive (CDs and DVDs are officially obsolete, folks!).
It starts off in a regular dream. I was in a mall meeting a bunch of old friends, and helping another carry a coffee table she wanted to buy. My hair was turning white. I looked in a mirror, and I was a disheveled looking woman with messy hair.
I run down the long dirt road. It starts to look unfamiliar, but I can kind of see that ahead past the bend in the road is the familiar place I was heading to, and that this is right. At least, that’s how it all feels.
But I’m also not going to keep running. I had done this too many times before, running around to explore the environment. It takes too long and isn’t productive.
I become more lucid. I stop running and stand there. I note that I had been breathing hard as if I were physically running, and it isn’t necessary.
I try to fly. No luck.
The environment really is striking. Lots of details around me, very real looking.
Cars pass either direction, and I jump on and off the hood of each car as it passes me. I note how easy it is to do that, and that I wouldn’t be able to do it in the physical world.
I decide to catch a ride. I hop on top of a van and sit. It’s an old loud van but does a decent job getting up over the hills.
I remember I have some tasks to do. I have a question I need to ask. The guy driving the van is as good a person to ask as any. At this point we’re seated in an open-top car. He’s in the driver’s seat and I’m behind him.
“Hey, what do I do about [health problem]?”
“You’re my subconscious. Or someone who knows something, or whatever. What do I do about [health problem]?”
“Oh, alright,” he says. “Hmm, well…”
He describes something that I don’t understand, but I catch the word “yeast”.
“So the yeast,” I say. “What do I do about that?”
“Hmm,” he replies. “That’s a very good question.”
He stands up. He is an extremely tall young Black guy, maybe 15 feet tall, in his early 20s. He leans over and a river of barf comes out of his mouth over the side of the car. He then turns to me.
“Jesus!” I exclaim. “Don’t do that on me!”
He turns and unloads another river of barf on the lady next to me in the back passenger seat. She seems to be ok with it.
The car stops as we pull up to a building.
“Hey, I gotta go,” he says. “I’ll catch you later.”
Oh well, I don’t seem to be getting anywhere with him for now anyway.
“Ok,” I say, “so think about it. I’ll get an answer from you later.”
“Sounds good, peace!” He goes inside.
I go for a short walk. The next thing I need to do is try to call my friend in the dream group. Let’s refer to her as “Sierra”. I need to stabilize the environment first like Kevin had told me. I find myself walking into some half-built structure. Not very appealing looking. I can’t call someone here. I look around. I don’t even know what the heck this is! It’s all still very real looking, clearer than normal, so that’s great, but this is like an under construction building with no roof and only partially done walls, and a couple platforms and a plank bridging across some kind of large draining ditch —
All of a sudden I see Sierra standing not far away!
Oh my god! Damn, that was quick! All I was doing was thinking about calling her in a moment. I sprint over to her and grab her shoulders.
The following conversation is approximate. I remember the gist of it but have forgotten some of our words.
She seems kind of loopy, and not all here.
“oooooh!” she says softly.
“Sierra, are you here?”
“No you aren’t,” she says.
I’ll take that as a no. She doesn’t seem all there. I keep talking to her forcefully, trying to keep her attention and bring her in.
“Sierra! It’s (Deagle) from the dream group! I’m completely lucid, and you’re here with me.”
She starts to look around for a second, then closes her eyes again.
“Sierra! I need you here! Open your eyes again.”
She flutters her eyes open a little and then stops.
“Yes! Just like that! You just opened your eyes for a second! Do it again.” I put my hands on her face to bring her attention to her eyes.
She seems to struggle with it a little. I feel like she needs to be more fully here still. She needs to pull the rest of herself in. I can see her whole body in entirety, but it’s like in a way only the lower half of her body is filled by her, and the rest of her is elsewhere.
During this time I don’t really consider that she could be just a dream character. I was aware that the tall Black dude was a dream character, but I was using him to my advantage. With Sierra I knew she could be as well, but I was more focused on the possibility that the reason she was so incoherent was because it was her but she was only partially there and in a dreamlike state, and I continued with that possibility in mind.
I think about what has helped me become lucid in the past when I’m caught in a dream.
“Breathe in deeply. You’re here. Pull yourself together. Breathe yourself in.”
She does so, and there’s some translucent angelic-like waves around her as she moves her arms out and up as she breathes in deeply. Finally she seems to be here.
“Are you here with me?” I ask. “What do you see?”
“There’s a roller coaster!” she says.
“Right over there.”
I look. I see nothing, an empty parking lot, some buildings in the distance, but not a roller coaster. “I don’t see it.”
“Yep, a nice looking roller coaster.”
I feel a little discouraged. “Ok, how about… right over there?” I point towards a building with a stick.
She says something I don’t catch.
“Say that again?” I ask.
I look and indeed it’s a KFC. Ok, that’s progress.
At about that point I abruptly lose it and wake up at around 3:20am, after 6 hours sleep.
I noted that as I woke physically I felt the normal grogginess I do when waking, and it took some energy for me to think, whereas just a moment ago I was very alert and energetic in the dream. The difference is interesting.
After I woke and wrote down most of my dream, I messaged Sierra to ask her about it. She had been asleep at the time but didn’t remember any kind of dream.